The Kindness of God

I am amazed at God's kindness and grace through labor and delivery! Chris and I are in awe of this whole experience. There are several things that I am thankful for. I'm so thankful that God made us aware of the low fluid levels in the womb. The thought of going home and not knowing that Noah wasn't getting oxygen is horrific! Of course, God would still be good and His plan would be worthy of praise, but it was so kind of him to give us this gift.

The Lord knew my desire to experience a natural labor and delivery and He also knew that on my own accord, I could NEVER have done it. Chris and I feel like we were just along for the ride while the Lord carried us through this experience. I really believe that He pushed me to my absolute end and there was sufficient grace to be found there. One of the things that I had written down to meditate on and remember throughout my labor was, "Trust God for His provision, and turn to Him as you come to the end of yourself. The demands of labor have been given by God as a gift. As I come to the end of my own resources, I am forced to turn to God for His help. It is good to cry out to Him. This is preparing me for all the times that I will need to cry out to God during Noah’s life. The utter helplessness of labor is teaching me to cling to the power of God in Noah’s life." This really happened! I was forced to come to the end of myself and to cry out to Him for help and there was certainly help to be found there.

Another thing Chris and I were trying to be reminded of, "I will learn that I can indeed obey God’s commands when everything in my body is pressing me towards selfishness. God will give more grace than I think possible!" Wow, this really happened too! Reflecting on yesterday I see how God purposed to force me through a natural labor even when I was ready to throw my goals out the window in order that I would see how much grace there is in Him. Thank you Lord! All Chris and I can keep saying is, "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you." God is so good to give us the gift of natural labor when I did NOT want to do it.

One fear that I expressed to Chris and a few others is that I didn't want to go into natural birth with a prideful attitude, depending on my own strength. By God's grace He made that impossible. I am certain that I didn't do it on my own strength. It was a good gift from God and that was it. I was BEGGING for an epidural and looking for any way out, but God, in His kindness, knew that I would be so blessed by natural birth. Thank you Lord!

Thank you for carrying me in a way that I have never felt before. Thank you, Lord, for showing Chris and I that we are helpless and it is only you that can do anything beautiful in and through us. Thank you for showing us this lesson before we entered parenthood! Thank you for never leaving or forsaking me through labor and every dark place I turned there was still grace to be found there. Thank you for giving Chris grace to stand so strong with me. Thank you for blessing us FAR beyond anything that we could ever ask or imagine when you delivered a perfect healthy son into our arms. You are so kind. Your kindness has literally overwhelmed me.